Just Thought I'd Share

Saturday, March 4, 2006

Topic: Divine Placement

Good morning folks!

It seems as though I'm always apologizing to you all for my neglect, so once again I apologize. Even as I do so, I should really be writing but I just had to share this little snippet.

Ever set a goal, go after it determinedly and when you achieve it almost regret having done so? Sound crazy? Let me elucidate:

I LOVE to eat! I have had a personal relationship with my intake that has been like no other in my lifetime. That being said:

I went into the cafeteria at work yesterday ostensibly for a nice tall 16oz glass of icy water. (In the past month and a half I have been making a concentrated effort to drop my membership in the big girls club. No great gym membership, no dancing to the oldies, no pilates workout for dancers... just a simple premise--when I'm full stop eating).

So there I was in the cafeteria, accompanied by Jeanne, the Temp who assists me with the filing and other tasks, when suddenly I found myself over at the omelette stand. (Friday is omelette day at work and can I tell you a little secret? Unless I make them myself, omelettes make me nauseous.)

Suddenly water wasn't good enough... I found myself ordering a scrambled egg with onions and sausages (yes, sausages in the first few days of Lent). I realized the sausage thingy after it was already on the cooker so loathe to create more work I just let it go--afterall it was an honest mistake, wasn't it?

Barbara, the cafeteria worker who was making the omelette (after all what is a huge scrambled egg that is chopped up and combined with the onions and sausages minus the cheese but a glorifed omelette) did her thing and I nibbled a bit of it and it tasted better than ever yesterday.

Well then, who can eat eggs without bread? How about a cinnamon raisin bagel with real butter and a 16oz glass of orange juice with ice in a separate cup so we can really get 16oz of juice? (Don't act like you haven't done that... lol)

I piled it all onto a tray plus the water I'd originally sought and Jeanne and I headed back to our work areas. I proudly showed my breakfast to the recently hired Compensation Manager, Michelle, whose office faced my cube. She showed creditable awe and I proceeded to wade into my treat with gusto. After all, it was payday, aren't you supposed to splurge on payday?

Less than four minutes later... I began to experience an alarming sensation--fullness. I looked at my plate and barely a third of it's contents was gone. This can't be, I thought to myself in dismay. This thought was quickly followed by another, so last night wasn't just a fluke? (I'd tried to eat a full plate of food the night before and experienced the same problem).

I reached out to Michelle, exhibiting my disgust. "Would you believe this! I finally accomplished what I wanted--stomach shrinkage, but only a third of my breakfast is gone! It hurts me to throw away two-thirds of my food, but who eats cold eggs?" (Yecch.)

Michelle said to me, "Did it taste good?"

"Yes."

"Did you enjoy it while you ate it?"

Getting an inkling where she was going, my response was a little slower in coming.

"Yeess."

"Then it's okay to throw it away."

(Noooooooo) I knew it! There it was--the choice: After years of conditioning as a child... eat all that food, clean that plate... there are hungry children in China! (Or whichever country they're using these days) Then when we turn eighteen we're told to watch what we eat or we'll become overweight!

Not one to give up, I shoveled in two more forkfuls, but aware now that I'd spoken up about the issue that I couldn't really sit there and try to finish the plate. I got up ostensibly to throw the eggs and barely touched sausage away (the smell in my bin would have been waay too much torture).

As I stood at the bin, close to the restroom... I couldn't resist furtively trying to shovel in a few more forkfuls. No one was around... no one really cared. It wasn't like Michelle was going to come around the corner to stand over my shoulder or anything, but when you know you're wrong, the guilt or sin consciousness is an ever present companion.

Finally, I regained control and tilted the contents of the plate into the garbage. What a rush! Reluctant? Yes. Guilt at waste? Yes. Guilt at pushing the envelope a bit? Yes. But way down deep, a sense of pride emanated out of my spirit to envelop my limbs as I felt goose pimples raise all over my skin. Wasn't it fortuitous that I'd been out spoken to Michelle and she said exactly the right thing?

I shared this sentiment with Michelle when I returned to my desk. Her simple response was, "I know how it is."

What's my point?

God places the people we need around us at the time we need them. Sometimes it's obvious at times it's subtle, but if we remain open they are able to step forward and bless us at the opportune moment.

Michelle's simple words freed me from the shackles of ingrained conditioning that had become a law in my life so that I was able to walk in grace and continue the path towards good health and a future of better housing for my spirit.

I encourage you to look around you today... appreciate the people God has positioned just for you and try to discern those for whom God has positioned you.

That's my sharing and caring moment for today. Have a blessed day and I will now fade to black...

Love,
Dee

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